zephyrl: anusking: those kids who make fake female orgasm noises in the middle of class thinking it’s the most hilarious thing on earth it’s the closest they’ll get to hearing an actual orgasm
celeryandhummus: our kids will probably attend a middle school dance where the theme is the 2010’s they’ll wear leggings with ugg boots and twerk to “call me maybe”
buing-iton-oppa: lacingpromises: when i hear someone talking about kpop: when its literally only Gangnam style
heartsblogcars: methlabrador: when people say “i dont believe in science” what are you even talking about
onebigroomfullofmoose: birdnipple: bad social habits i have mumbling not smiling trailing off crossing my arms looking angry even though im not angry the fact i cant even socialize the fact im me
gnarly-gnat: imagine every time you had an orgasm you laughed like the pillsbury doughboy
skypestripper: hi yes i would like a glass of attention please
i bought my first online item with my debit card on the 10th. some circle lenses and some lashes….wHERE THE FUCK ARE T HEy??!
me at school: omg when i get home i've got to do loads of shit like finish that project and read that book omg i need to review for that test too omg so much to do
me at home:
pickup line: i told my therapist about you
vexarion: ifyoucarryonthisway: i need a job where i work one hour a week and i get paid a thousand dollars a minute
fartgallery: if I start blushing and you yell “awww you’re embarrassed!!!!!” I will never speak to you ever again
ichigoflavor: AFTER LEAVING MY LAPTOP IN THE LIVING ROOM FOR A FEW MINUTES TO GO TAKE A SHOWER I COME BACK AND I SEE THIS AND THERE’S LIKE 394823984789 TABS OPENED IN THE SAME IMAGES AND A SCREENSHOT OF THIS PAGE ON PHOTOSHOP. MY BrOTHER IS GNNA DiE
dooblerdoo: whenever I create a text post
Today, I wore pajamas and a sheet at school...
nonymoose: forevermisslady: bitch-i-might-be-hannibal: nonymoose: oh my god Sherlock? YES! I was walking down a crowded hallway with my friend and she accidentally stepped on my sheet and I froze and said, “Get. Off. My. Sheet!“ Nobody laughed. Except me.
kurokoshirai: i hate that fucking “i love math because it’s the same in all languages” bullshit so much like you know what so’s farting